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Paul Gascoigne's pre-season 'b*llockings' – pigeon toothpaste, manager prank and zoo raid
EXCLUSIVE: Daily Star Sport spoke with former Tottenham Hotspur and Newcastle United midfielder Paul Gascoigne to hear all about some of his legendary pre-season antics
During his playing days, wherever Paul Gascoigne went, chaos usually followed
Arguably England's most talented midfielder of all time, 'Gazza' was an entertainer both on and off the pitch. The former Tottenham Hotspur and Newcastle United star played a pivotal role in helping the Three Lions to the reach the semi-finals of Italia 90 and Euro 96.
Unfortunately on both occasions, England and Gascoigne were unable to overcome Germany, losing both semi-finals in agonising fashion on penalties. However, tournament heartbreak aside, some of the more memorable moments from Gascoigne's career came from the sheer vast number of wild incidents he seemed to get himself involved in.
And with that in mind, Daily Star Sport decided to sit down with the legendary England midfielder to find out some more about his best memories from pre-season - which included a lengthy anecdote about a zoo and an ostrich.
"There was one with Terry Venables," Gascoigne began, before launching into his pre-season memories. "I remember getting a bollocking, I think we were in Norway. I was starving, I went and found a big chicken and threw it onto his bed. There was another one where I got a bollocking, I was hanging out of a window with toothpaste, I saw some pigeons and people down below getting cash out of a machine. I kept on squeezing toothpaste out and flicking it, and I was hitting people in the back of the head.
"They’re going, ‘oh sh*t,’ they thought it was a pigeon! I could see a couple of people that I hit coming into the hotel, I was like six floors up. My door just went, it was Terry Venables saying ‘what are you doing?’ I was like, ‘what do you mean?’ He just knew it had been me. There was another time I was away with Lazio on pre-season, I remember the manager Zdenek Zeman used to whistle all the time, he was Yugoslavian.
"I remember pinching his whistle, jumping a fence and wrapping it around a turkey’s neck. Another one in pre-season, the lads said, ‘Gazza, do something funny’ and I went ‘no no no, I can’t’ and they said ‘oh, you’re boring.’ That’s something I’m f***ing not! As we’re going home, we pass a zoo, and I thought I know what I’m gonna do. So, the next morning at 9am, the guy who lived in the zoo, I opened the gates, went in and knocked on his door.
"He went, ‘wow, Gazza, football!’ I went, ‘yeah.’ He said, ‘what do you want?’ I said ‘an ostrich.’ He gives me an ostrich, f***ing hilarious. I put a number 8 shirt on it, put it in the back of the car and drove to the training ground. I waited until the lads had started training and Terry Venables came out, I went ‘gaffer, I’ve got a player for you. He’s quick!’ I threw it on the pitch, he just shook his head. The ostrich was f***ing hilarious, the lads were running side to side and the ostrich was following them.
"They finished training at 12:30, have you ever tried catching an ostrich? I finished at about 5pm. It was a right state, fellas were everywhere. I took it back to the zoo, they said ‘what are you doing to my f***ing ostrich?’ I went, ‘gaffer’s not signing it, it’s sh*t in front of goal.’ There was one where we’d finished training and there was a spa with a jacuzzi. I put it on full blast, got shampoo and squeezed all of it into the jacuzzi.
"There was a bit of foam coming up and I’ve left and gone back to my hotel room. One of the players went, ‘Gazza, have you seen the spa room?’ You couldn’t see it, there were bubbles all the way to the top of the ceiling. Straightaway, Terry Venables went, ‘Gazza! Get in here and get all of the bubbles away.’ It took me ages."
Of course, there was the odd, spectacularly rare, occasion where Gascoigne was not the mastermind of the antics and incidents that surround every team he played in, with some of his team-mates framing him as a result. However, the former England international was clear that when something unusual or funny happened during his playing days, it usually happened because of him.
Gascoigne added: "Probably some of them, yeah [when asked if he was ever blamed for things he didn't do], but I did a few daft things. Another one was when I went fishing with Rangers, I caught a big cod and I said I’ll keep that and take it back to the hotel. On the way back, there was a guy in his room sleeping with the window open and I just couldn’t resist. I did some mad things in pre-season."
Daily Star Sunday
EXCLUSIVE: Daily Star Sport spoke with former Tottenham Hotspur and Newcastle United midfielder Paul Gascoigne to hear all about some of his legendary pre-season antics
During his playing days, wherever Paul Gascoigne went, chaos usually followed
Arguably England's most talented midfielder of all time, 'Gazza' was an entertainer both on and off the pitch. The former Tottenham Hotspur and Newcastle United star played a pivotal role in helping the Three Lions to the reach the semi-finals of Italia 90 and Euro 96.
Unfortunately on both occasions, England and Gascoigne were unable to overcome Germany, losing both semi-finals in agonising fashion on penalties. However, tournament heartbreak aside, some of the more memorable moments from Gascoigne's career came from the sheer vast number of wild incidents he seemed to get himself involved in.
And with that in mind, Daily Star Sport decided to sit down with the legendary England midfielder to find out some more about his best memories from pre-season - which included a lengthy anecdote about a zoo and an ostrich.
"There was one with Terry Venables," Gascoigne began, before launching into his pre-season memories. "I remember getting a bollocking, I think we were in Norway. I was starving, I went and found a big chicken and threw it onto his bed. There was another one where I got a bollocking, I was hanging out of a window with toothpaste, I saw some pigeons and people down below getting cash out of a machine. I kept on squeezing toothpaste out and flicking it, and I was hitting people in the back of the head.
"They’re going, ‘oh sh*t,’ they thought it was a pigeon! I could see a couple of people that I hit coming into the hotel, I was like six floors up. My door just went, it was Terry Venables saying ‘what are you doing?’ I was like, ‘what do you mean?’ He just knew it had been me. There was another time I was away with Lazio on pre-season, I remember the manager Zdenek Zeman used to whistle all the time, he was Yugoslavian.
"I remember pinching his whistle, jumping a fence and wrapping it around a turkey’s neck. Another one in pre-season, the lads said, ‘Gazza, do something funny’ and I went ‘no no no, I can’t’ and they said ‘oh, you’re boring.’ That’s something I’m f***ing not! As we’re going home, we pass a zoo, and I thought I know what I’m gonna do. So, the next morning at 9am, the guy who lived in the zoo, I opened the gates, went in and knocked on his door.
"He went, ‘wow, Gazza, football!’ I went, ‘yeah.’ He said, ‘what do you want?’ I said ‘an ostrich.’ He gives me an ostrich, f***ing hilarious. I put a number 8 shirt on it, put it in the back of the car and drove to the training ground. I waited until the lads had started training and Terry Venables came out, I went ‘gaffer, I’ve got a player for you. He’s quick!’ I threw it on the pitch, he just shook his head. The ostrich was f***ing hilarious, the lads were running side to side and the ostrich was following them.
"They finished training at 12:30, have you ever tried catching an ostrich? I finished at about 5pm. It was a right state, fellas were everywhere. I took it back to the zoo, they said ‘what are you doing to my f***ing ostrich?’ I went, ‘gaffer’s not signing it, it’s sh*t in front of goal.’ There was one where we’d finished training and there was a spa with a jacuzzi. I put it on full blast, got shampoo and squeezed all of it into the jacuzzi.
"There was a bit of foam coming up and I’ve left and gone back to my hotel room. One of the players went, ‘Gazza, have you seen the spa room?’ You couldn’t see it, there were bubbles all the way to the top of the ceiling. Straightaway, Terry Venables went, ‘Gazza! Get in here and get all of the bubbles away.’ It took me ages."
Of course, there was the odd, spectacularly rare, occasion where Gascoigne was not the mastermind of the antics and incidents that surround every team he played in, with some of his team-mates framing him as a result. However, the former England international was clear that when something unusual or funny happened during his playing days, it usually happened because of him.
Gascoigne added: "Probably some of them, yeah [when asked if he was ever blamed for things he didn't do], but I did a few daft things. Another one was when I went fishing with Rangers, I caught a big cod and I said I’ll keep that and take it back to the hotel. On the way back, there was a guy in his room sleeping with the window open and I just couldn’t resist. I did some mad things in pre-season."
Daily Star Sunday